Happy New Year - This moment!

Happy New Year! It has been quiet over here because we got slammed with the sickness (stomach bug) and then the holidays happened. Am I right? In fact, I got another cold that took me by surprise right before the new year which left me barely with a voice on the start of 2017. I realized quickly that I talk a lot and it was humbling to start the year with more listening and an awareness of the amount that I rely on my voice. I also was oh so very grateful for the flu bug to get not just my sweet little boy, but also me. It shut everything down out of my life and gave me this sense of gratitude for each moment of life that sometimes is easy to forget. In fact, I have let the responsibilities of the week and the transition back to the grind of running to dance and school get the best of me and of course get in my head. But as I type and remember those days of pure gratitude for each moment I am quickly reminded of what I want out of my 2017. 


There is SO MUCH talk about resolutions and how we are going to start 2017 off right and how we can do better and be stronger and, and and. For me I thought I was ready for all of the hype but then 2017 happened and I felt like I missed something big. I felt like I should have wrote more in my 2017 planner for my 2017 intentions and I felt like I should be taking care of myself better with more sleep and less caffeine and no more drinks. As I mentioned I could barely talk on Sunday and Monday, not to mention Monday my husband's last day of vacation he was spent with him in the bathroom getting whatever we had a week before. Needless to say I was in survival mode and trying to heal whatever bug had taken over my throat and chest. I am thankful to say the the Young Living essential oils helped me out a lot, even when I still choose to have a little chocolate and adult drink. 

Either way, my point is this, all of the hype of starting out right can be AMAZING if you have a plan and you kick ass at it. What about if life had other plans for you and you just rolled into 2017 like it was another day? Perhaps I am not alone in this, but I just went on my merry way living and loving. And it felt good the first couple days, but now that we are in week one of January and my monkey mind has taken over I have had a few moments where I clench my jaw and stomach and think, crap I missed this opportunity. But wait, did I? Is there anything magical about a new year? Don't we truly get a new refresh each time we take a breath? Are you tracking with me? For me I love a new moon or a the start to a new month, but that doesn't mean that I am not okay if I do'nt do anything to honor this new beginning. Couldn't it be okay to just honor that each day is a gift and like the mom of my husband taught him, "your day is only as good as you make it!" 

So my friends I share this to say that regardless of how your 2017 has started, I say it doesn't matter. Good job if you are using it as leverage to change something you have always wanted to change or start doing something that makes you feel better. That is awesome and I support you. And if you didn't, may I ask you a favor? Can you join me in honoring that you are amazing right now, whether you had an afternoon coffee, forgot to wash you face, starting 10 things today but finished nothing. Please remember your choice is right now to honor the amazing YOU that exists inside of you each and every moment. I ask you this from the bottom of my heart because i know my own battles try to do x, y, and z and then, and only then can I truly love myself or be satisfied or happy. And that my friends is the farthest thing from the truth. That has hurt me in too many ways and as I type it is clear that my focus for 2017 is to LOVE LOVE LOVE. 

I will LOVE me and LOVE you and LOVE the good times and the times I am barfing in my toilet. Why? Because I am alive. In fact, in a call with my coach just last week we talked about everything being love. Yesterday, when my daughter was freaking out because her shoe was on the porch and it was frozen because it was below zero, I went and locked myself in our tiny laundry room. I kicked the garbage can and tried to breathe. I am sure it was just a bit of wheezing and a lot of face and jaw clenching. I said aloud to myself, "how and the hell is her behavior love? This is crap. It is not possible." I was stumped. So I stood their longer. I grunted a little and for sure held my breath. Until I took a breath and then another and another. I kept thing love. And eventually after about 3 or 4 minutes my shoulders soften enough for my brain to function. I remembered the love I have for her and realized that my job is to use each moment as teachable. 

So I left the laundry room and of course had a lot of words, but they were calmer. It was simply around natural consequences and that because of the drama around the cold shoe we would be late. Also, that I need her help getting stuff ready the night before so it isn't so hard getting ready in the morning. And finally, that despite that intense and not so fun few minutes, "your day is only as good as you make it!" We make better choices when we are calm and avoid going to that place where are at a zero and find our way to ten. We don't accidentally fall down the stairs or run into a wall or kick a garbage can or laundry basket. Yes? We breathe, we choose, and damn it, even if it isn't what you wanted to do or say, you move forward and you choose to be love. You choose not to beat yourself up, but show up and do what is right. It is not worth ruining the rest of a day, a week a month, or even a year. 

I will tell you as much as those minutes yesterday sucked for me as a mom, I am proud to say I came out of it with more grace than a typical morning. And as I think back to it on this extremely cold afternoon I think to myself, that was supposed to happen. That moment was my reminder to me to give myself permission to let 2017 be as it will be. Yes, I will set goals and resolutions (sankalpa in sanskrit), and do everything I can to be my best self. But the whole point in starting this website and sharing my heart is because no rules means no rules. It means each moment and day will be different and we must honor just that. So I might have another small glass of wine tonight or maybe I won't, that moment will tell me thaht. But what I do know is that my intuition and inner guide will know what to do and when I wrap everything up in love, the rest will follow.

Where are you at on this first week of 2017? Have you jumped all in? Are you struggling? Are you grounded? Are you tired? Honestly, wherever you are at, it is perfect. You are exactly where you are supposed to be. I honor you and all of your greatness. Be true to you and I ask you just one more time, be kind to you and love you up. You are WORTH IT! 

In so much love and gratitude,