New Year Reflections

What is your intention for your day, week, month and year?

Today I have a long list as I prep for my daughter to turn 8 tomorrow and for my busier days of teaching Thursday - Saturday. I decided before I keep going I would sit down and just look at my website for a moment to update my teaching scheduling and then read a post I wrote on New Year's Day. Inspired by a recent FB and blogger, I decided why write and not share. So I added a couple tags and am posting. 

What I find pretty lovely about this writing is that my intention for 2018 has stayed very close to what I wrote. I am choosing to be selective in my yes column so I can unravel and live in each day with the gifts at hand. I have finally realized mess will be in my life as a mama (right now lunch dishes in front of me and kitchen still not cleaned up from lunch). Instead of wait until it feels organized, clean, perfect, or like I have met my first goal, I am leaning into each moment a little bit more. I am also finding that being grateful and loving right now is actually bringing me closer to my goals and helping me simply be happier in each moment. 

No, I do not have it all together. Yes, my clothes are too tight and I have a hard time (still) following the SIBO diet and trying to challenge foods. No, I still haven't finished my Vinyasa Krama training (still need to complete a book report) and Yes, I am still filling out a goal-book to help me prioritize and haven't even gotten to the month section. Ha. Maybe it will be for April - September or maybe I won't get to it for a couple more months. However, the bottom line is that taking the time to be intentional is helping me immediately. 

And that is all I have for now. I am doing my best each and every day. I need to head and get more water for now and maybe clean up a bit, but I promise you I will keep sharing whether in videos or words or however I can. I know it help my soul feel content. And that is a win. 

Check out my writing from 2018 and more importantly, take a pause to check-in with YOU. How are things going so far and if you did set goals/intentions for 2018 how are they going? If you didn't, is there an intention that you want to put forth for the next season? Where your attention goes energy flows right? So remember that. And please note: I didn't credit anyone for that because when I looked up I found about 5 authors. I will take any clarification if you have. :) 

Written Jan 1, 2018

I cannot help but pause for a brief moment and reflect on the past year. I think it is important to take even five minutes to look at where you have been and where you are headed. As I sit at the coffee shop I am supposed to be finishing my final homework assignment for my Vinyasa Krama and I realize that I have learned so much over the last year plus. It has been a year of trying lots of new things, with intention and some things rushed. It has been a year of sometimes not listening to what is in my best interest and then feeling the consequences of those actions. 

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As a mom, wife, friend, daughter, sister and more I realize I have lots of hats to wear. In this endeavor of life I know I am not alone in that regard. What I can tell you today is that things have evolved and changed many times since I became a mom almost eight years ago. It is honestly crazy and amazing all at the same time. In the last year it has become very clear to me that although we are all very unique we also have a lot in common. We all desire to thrive. We all desire to connect to something bigger than us. We are all our best and most shiny version of ourselves when we are true to who we are, what is important and doing what we feel is the best in this particular day. 

There are so many expectations put on us for what we should do. We are supposed to look a certain way and talk a certain way. We are supposed to exercise and eat healthy and love others and love ourselves, say the right thing, do the right thing, etc. We are supposed to squeeze it all in and somehow find faith in this crazy thing called life. This last year of 2017 has brought forth many emotions and scenarios of life that have brought to our attention the intensity of being human. That with the light that is in the world and goodness comes the other side of darkness. And yes, it has been painful and impacted many people, but what I say to that is that we must all keep moving forward unique to YOU.

That is my biggest lesson. We have the potential to overcome these bigger social issues, and the potential to overcome our own suffering and internal struggles. Whether they are specific to you or something bigger, they all matter and they are all connected. 

I often feel very helpless and by nature, am more of a nervous person. I have always been a bit jumpy, simply waiting for something bad/shitty to happen. As a kid, my friends would tell me to "relax!" That wasn't my favorite response, but it was truth. That was not fun in many moments of my life. But more importantly, I have learned that these worries are not mine to carry. If I keep carrying the worries of what I cannot control I am going to make myself sick and suffer most of my life. Instead, I know that leaning into faith and gratitude will help me to be free. This faith will help me to continue to believe in something bigger than me and to enjoy the gift of life. 

In addition to faith I have seen the magic of gratitude in a way that words cannot describe. It is true that when we are grateful for life and its blessings and its pain we can raise our vibration. For example, the last three months I have been so challenged with my SIBO healing protocol and some huge physical pain and limitations. I get so pissed and want to say "f this!" However, I know that if I lean into my frustration it is going to keep me away from actually healing. Thus, I use the technique discussed in Melissa Gilbert's book, Magic and Rod Stryker's Four Desires Book, which he calls the "miracle angle." How can I find gratitude for what is? Even if it sucks you-know-what. 

I will tell you that this has gotten me through and in some cases, has given me the perspective I think I always needed. For example, I have always been challenged at the holidays. Specifically, I think a lot about my body during this time of year and try to eat perfect, workout as I should, and am constantly judging my body, the workouts, the things I eat, etc. It is as thought I have never been good enough and I think, if I can just lose ten pounds or get that job or, fill in the blank, I will be happy. Next Christmas I will be more fit and have my shit together and I will enjoy it better...and this year just get through it. 

What did I finally lock in this last year, in particular the last couple months of being very challenged? That we are always going to be striving for the next thing. But what if being grateful for what is, is exactly what I need to find the joy, peace and self-love that is always there? And to be honest, I tried it this year. WE didn't have it together at Christmas this year (but somehow pulled it off), I had to make my own special food, I wasn't feeling awesome sometimes, etc., but this year I actually felt the magic of the holidays. It was as though instead of me striving for that extra ten pounds to be gone, or to be more organized or other things I just said, well, this is where I am and darn it, I am blessed. 

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From an eating-disorder perspective, I am on a very restrictive diet that has challenged me in many ways. However, finally I realize that I must embrace the process of the food that will help me to heal. I would be lying if it doesn't come back some times, but I know that I have to surrender to simply being the best version of me and trusting the process of healing. What keeps me going even more was the self-love meditation we did last spring when Rod Stryker was in town and I felt a self-love that is already there. Wow was that powerful and when I start to struggle I realize that. And I think, why do I have to wait to be happy and feel good about me? And then I come back to my true nature. 

And as a mom, well, I realize that breathing more will be a HUGE win for me in 2018. I didn't realize until recently that being a mom made me do a lot of inhales. Or as my daughter's teacher reminds us of the Zones of Regulation. I am pretty sure I am in the green zone a lot less than I should. And knowing what I know now, being stressed and inhaling too often has depleted me so much that I think has contributed to my sickness. I know I am depleted and I need to nourish and fill up this year. I am excited to share more about how I am doing that with my own yoga practice in 2018. I know that we deserve to feel better, that it all matters, and that I can keep healing and thrive. 

So I will close with that. My intention is to bring forth a deeper level of commitment to life by being my best version of me. I will stand in my truth and find love, faith and surrender each and every day. I will honor that each day will be different and that I cannot control life, but can control how I react to it. And finally, I am going to be more focused and intentional in where I give my time. I get excited about all sorts of ideas and things that require my time, but there are only 24-hours in a day. 

I am excited to be focused, loving, open, adaptable, and grateful. I am blessed with an abundance of support and love and cannot wait to enjoy the people that I am so lucky to love and that love me back. 

What are you doing today, this week, this month and where do you want your attention to go? (used to say...what are you doing this New Year to reflect and where do you want your attention to go?"). You intentions don't have to be cheesy at all. What matters is that we understand each day is a new day, regardless of it is Jan 1. or Feb. 19, or clearly March 6. Each day matters, each thought matters, each action matters, and YOU matter. 

Take good care. 

In love and so much gratitude,

Kristin

Check-in Monday, October 24, 2016

This last week was a blur and again, these check-ins are helpful for me because it helps me to pause and reflect on last week and get ready for this week. I would love to take the time this week to share last week's learnings to you in hopes that it will encourage you to look at last week and see what you might want to do more of and what you might want to do less of. Additionally, I will take a look at what I want to get out of this coming week as each week brings us new challenges and opportunities for each of us. 

This post has a few pictures from this weekend's adventure in California, where I flew into San Francisco and met my husband to celebrate our anniversary! Today the pictures remind me of the good times and the simple beauty of life. The picture out of the airplane looked like a blanket of clouds; it is always so breathtaking to see the world from the view in a plane.  

Last week's reflections

  • I know that sleep was a BIG focus and intention for me. Guess what? it was the WORST week for sleep for me. A part of it was that my week was full, but then another part was that my energy was scattered with life and planning a weekend away. Also, I didn't make sleep a priority and sometimes felt like I was rebelling when I wouldn't go to bed. It was as though I forgot how shitty I feel when I don't sleep and the negative impact on ALL of my life. For me, I am wondering if setting weekly intentions that specific, such as, I will sleep eight hours a night, is less than ideal for me? I am wondering if less rules and more going off of "how is this going to make me feel?" will drive me to actually change. I am honestly not sure what it might take for me to make changes, but I do know I will keep sharing this sleep one to you because it is a big challenge on my journey. In fact, I am up past ten right now typing because I am a bit wired from being on California time. Bottom line, I am sure I will sleep more this week without even trying. :) 
  • I was challenged big time from on faith and anxiety. On Friday I took my very first flight alone and rented a car, alone. I met my husband out in wine country for our anniversary. Until I was waiting for the plane it hadn't dawned on me that it was my first time alone for either of these adventures, but it definitely helped me gain power in my abilities and faith in me. The short version of the story is that there was a maintenance issue with the toilet on the plane and my imagination got the best of me. I simply felt worried and so much more. However, with the support of my coach and hubby I realized I could channel my faith and find that place of peace right away through my breath, visualization and meditation. It was a pretty profound experience for me and one that I would love to share in more detail in a future post. Bottom line: we all hold within us that internal power to stay steady and filled with faith so that we may enjoy life and trust the process. And on top of that, because it was so new and out of the ordinary I felt like a badass mama living and loving! 
  • I had an awesome weekend in Sonoma, California, celebrating my wedding anniversary with my handsome husband (11 years)! Like I mentioned above, I met him out there because he was out there for work and it was a leap of courage for me to be independent. For some this might seem laughable, but for me it was a moment of being brave so that I could create experiences, connection and memories with the love of my life. I am so proud and so happy to have gone and am home again with my beautiful family. I am blessed beyond belief and feel excited and renewed to be back. And I always feel so free and happy in wine country. It is a place to me that feels like home and that I simply LOVE to spend time in. It also helps that our best pals are out there and that makes it even better! Thank you again wine country for an amazing time!
  • I forgot about my daily intention and "I Am" statements until I looked back at last week's post. These can be oh so lovely and I will remember to weave these in, especially on the days that I feel off or crabby. They are so good at redirecting me and keeping me grounded. But this past week it was just too much.

This week's intention

As mentioned above, I am not so sure how well I do when I drill down too specifically regarding what I want to do in my week. Having specific goals actually seem to back fire for me and my recent experience. Thus, this week I am going to take a different approach. I want to keep it simple by creating one over-arching theme for the week with an understanding of how it will generally impact the big rocks in my life. I will see how this works this week and for sure will let you know!

This week's intention: I plan to make choices this week all around choosing things that make me feel good. I am not getting specific on the glasses of water or hours of sleep. However, I am going to use this as my guide. What is going to make me FEEL GOOD?

I would imagine this is going to include more sleep, daily meditation, exercises more laughter and vegetables. And perhaps an espresso (but not five). Additionally, I think getting organized in my house and business will help keep me grounded in what next. And finally, I am trying to attempt to get ahead of the holiday season with a plan and scheduling in experiences, deciding the budget, and the calendar for the rest of 2016. My hope that if I have holiday plan and get ahead it will create time in our life to take care of me and my family to actually enjoy the days. When it gets darker we should do less and if I can get ahead of it maybe I will begin to see and feel the magic of togetherness, faith and generosity. I often try the theme of "No-vember" to attempt to create more self care, but it doesn't typically come out a success. That is why I am going to try to schedule things in advance so that I know when I have to say no because it is too much. And just maybe this might shift the way it feels to us all. Who knows how that will all shake out, but I have decided to be grateful for the positive outcome of this change from getting ahead of it. Feel grateful before it happens right? And getting ahead for the holidays to me feels very similar to a successful day in the life of kids--you know the days you are ahead of it all (dinner made early, birthday present bought a week before the party, homework turned in early, etc.)? Those are fun days, and while not always ideal, they definitely free up the days for a lot more fun and present moments.

So my friends, this week is a new week and that always feels good. I am going to try less hard by just being me and using my intuition and knowing of what feel's good as my guide. What are you going to do this week that is going to support you? Do you need to keep on truck'in or do you need to shake things up? Only YOU know the answer.

Have an amazing week.

In love, light and gratitude,

Kristin

p.s. Happy Birthday Mom - you are a light in my life and I love you more than you will know! XO 

Check-in Mondays - Week of Oct. 17

Happy Monday! Are you tired today after all of the energy of the super moon and perhaps the restless nights of sleep? Today I feel excited for the week, but feeling a little off physically. Also, my head is full with ideas, weekly to-dos, and more! This weekend I was away at a Young Living Conference to learn more about products and a company I love. Even more important I was with my beautiful sister and we got to have time to connect. It was awesome. I was quickly reminded of the power of connection as I was away from my family. I even had my own hotel room; a part of me didn’t want to go back to the conference the second day because of how blissful the quiet was without responsibilities in the sink or anywhere else hiding around the corner. Also, I haven’t stayed in a hotel alone for more than six years (gasp)!

As I think of this week ahead I reflect on last week's intention, but more importantly how I feel and what inspiration I left the weekend with. Last weekend I was reminded in many ways to be yourself, and I mean BE YOU! Be grounded in who you are because the way you are is purposeful. When we are authentic in who we are and show up in life it can come together in a form of success that is different for us all. But I am telling you this; I have yet to find a success story of someone trying to be someone else. “Being you” is embedded as a theme in each success story I have found, whether it was from this weekend, books I’ve read, podcasts and more.

I can’t help but think back to the last post I wrote on the Pain of Not Practicing: when you know yourself and dharma code (your purpose) and are living it and being authentic in you, you will thrive in all areas of your life. From my perspective dharma code is a fancy way of saying BE YOU! Isn’t that fun? I know the times that I truly am grounded in me I have a lot more fun and life becomes a bit more effortless.

This week:

I know I can get ahead of myself with all that I want to accomplish at home, in and on my business and more. However, I know that it is only one week, and a short one at that. The kids are out of school on Wednesday so the flow of the week is different. Thus, today I want to do three things in our Check-In Monday:

  1. Check in on how last week went
  2. Share my intention for this week 
  3. Quick reminder to you to check in for YOU!

1.How did last week go?

Overall, it went decent. I felt like I had set a lot of goals and did my best to keep the themes positive and even small changes I attempted to celebrate. Looking back I feel like I was a bit aggressive, but that can be good some weeks.

  • Sleep – I had a few nights of eight hours of sleep and other nights not so much. This was a win overall, and I know I can do better. Also, I realize without sleep I pretty much SUCK at life. I am hungrier, crabbier, my mind is restless and all over the place. Also, gratitude feels forced. You know what I am talking about—the days when you go in public and everyone bugs the crap out of you; even you bug yourself!
  • Water—I am realizing that I can amp this up even more because I often think I am good at drinking water and am not. Adding in a glass or even a half of glass before meals is helping a lot. However, some days I am scrounging and never eating a meal so that doesn’t always work. More on that later.
  • Gratitude—This is always a day booster and I especially did this with my kiddos at dinner, bedtime and on the way to school. It keeps me in check and helps me let go of the often shit-show moments of parenthood.
  • Food—I actually had to look back at last week’s goal. I have no idea what it was, perhaps it was to eat more veggies? But, I do know that I tried to actually eat and sit down and maybe had a few more moments when I actually sat down to eat the meal vs. just eating on the run. Often times I am having a bit here and there and not truly knowing if and what I have eaten. Thus, it doesn’t matter what last week’s goal was, I know that I need more of those moments of putting something, anything on a plate, and looking at it, pausing with a breath or two and actually eating it without distractions or usually the mommy anger that I can have during meal time. Yes, kids can be so irritating during a meal. Maybe I should take my plate and lock myself in the bathroom some nights? 
  • Breathe and be present—Again, I tried my best to do this and did my best when I was one-on-one with really amazing friends I was blessed to hang out with last week. I realize these moments of being much more present feel so good. As for being present in real life and as a mom, well, I think there is room for improvement. Maybe I should set my phone down or let go of the to-do list or flippin breathe!
  • No swearing in front of the kiddos—I think that must have been a typo last week. I don’t swear in front of the kids. :) Or maybe I need to push this one out. Maybe I will just be more kind in general or breathe like I tried to above and the swearing will simply subside.

2. This week’s intention—in the effort to be adaptable while getting stuff done this week here are my intentions.

  • Sleep. It is clearly the foundation. Thus, I will be in bed each night eight hours and the goal is to do this 5 out of 7 nights.
  • Water. It is what keeps us going and can benefit us even more this time of year by sickness prevention. I’m obviously not a doctor but I have heard hydration can help with that and everything else. The lemon water in the morning can be a life saver if you know what I mean. Eight glasses for me a day seems like a good goal. I am at 3:00 and have had 4 glasses; maybe that is why I feel shaky? Or maybe my morning caffeine is still bothering me. Eek.
  • I will set my daily intention and in addition I have written these "I AM" statements to anchor my week: I want/need to get some stuff done this week and I want to enjoy my kiddos and my life in the present.  Thus, these “I am” statements seem to support me getting through my week with grace. Again, the adaptable one is huge for me because for those of you that know me, know that I love love love structure and I struggle and am agitated when life isn’t as I plan it. Ha. That seems funny to even write, but it is a reality and I will definitely need more work on adaptability.

This week's Intention:

I am Playful
I am Grateful
I am Focused
I am Adaptable
I am faithful

3. YOU: What are you doing to support you this week? What do you need this week? What did you kick butt at last week? What do you need more of? What do you need less of? Can you be grateful for your good and not so good moments last week? Each moment is a lesson and you are truly amazing for being You! You have the power to choose each moment and make this week great. I am sending you so much love and gratitude as you move into another week. 

Thank you so much for reading!!! Have an amazing week and happy fall!

In love, light and gratitude,

Kristin